I am sure you all have heard about the TV show ‘13 Reasons Why’, a story that revolves around a girl whom committed suicide. Being bullied was one of the many reasons why she did it.
So, I asked myself, how far can someone go to the point where the victim takes their own life?
“Would everyone’s lives be better off without me?” A question you don’t normally hear first-hand. Sometimes we don’t see it coming like it’s completely out of the norm to hear such things happen. We say things like “Why would they do that to themselves?” or “Don’t they love themselves and the people around them enough?”
In my opinion, yes you shouldn’t even think of committing suicide in the first place, but we never even try to see it through the victim’s perspective nor understand it. So we tend to feel confused and surprised when we hear about it from a friend or on the news. Some choose to help but others may not which has always made me wonder why.
I had the opportunity to discuss of these matters with one of the counsellors from the SSD department’s Counselling & Development Unit in INTI. The counsellor I spoke to was generous enough to openly talk about her opinions on suicide and bullying and how this can affect not only the person who is going through it but also the people around them. However, she chose to remain anonymous and her name shall not be included in this article.
She started off by saying we need to show we care, they need to know that there are people out there who can help and support them. I asked her what she thinks the reason is for someone to commit suicide.
“It’s not selfish, they do it because they don’t think they have a better alternative to solve their problems,” she explained. “They don’t know that there are people out there who can help and so they do not ask for help. They idealize suicide because of this.”
I asked whether the victims ever thought of how it would affect the people who love them.
“I believe that they do take it into consideration but when they have decided to take their own life, they will,” she continued. “Because suicidal actions are personal, as though they are fighting with their own mentality at this point rather than with other people.” I asked whether the victims ever thought of how it would affect the people who love them.
Does bullying play a big part in being suicidal?
“Yes, it does. Physical or emotional abuse, it can play with the victim’s emotions. If the victim thinks there is no other way out, they will use the only option they think they have which is suicide. Because they think they are the only ones facing it they tend to keep it to themselves. They need to remember that they are not alone.”
If any of you have certain doubts, take a chance to talk to our CDU counsellors whom I am sure are willing to attend to your needs. Their office is located at Block A, Level 1.
“Willingness to seek help is a sign of bravery, courage is not the absence of fear, it’s acting despite fear”.